- I’m sorry, I’ve been trying to break the record for "the most calls
missed" if it’s a emergency, please hold on till the record is broken. And I will
call you back. - Hi. This is John:
If you are the phone company, I already sent the money.
If you are my parents, please send money.
If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money.
If you are my friends, you owe me money.
If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money. - Hi, this is
Stephanie's answering machine. If you're the phone company asking for money, stop
bugging her, she'll send it sooner or later. If you're a TV company advertising
TVs, she already has a TV with every channel known to man, and several known
to monkeys. If you called for any other reasons, please hang up the phone,
start screaming, and run to the nearest shoe store. When you get there, ask them
for a cheeseburger. (This probably won't help you, but we'll always have
something to laugh about when we're bored.) - (With loud music playing in the
background) "Hello... HELLO?? I can't hear you! What? Oh.. we're not home, leave a
message. - "(In funny old lady voice) Hello, you have reached the ----family
and we can not come to the phone right now. Please leave your name, phone
number, short message, social security number, and credit card number and we will
call you when we're done shopping." - We're sorry. You have reached an
imaginary number. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again. - Hi. I'm home
right now, I'm just screening my calls. So start talking and if you're someone I
want to speak with I'll pick up the phone. Otherwise, well, what can I say?
Pic of the Day
9:41:37 AM 
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